As the years go on in my marriage I’ve notice that things get much easier. We know each others ‘buttons’ and try not to push them, we know each others needs and try to help them, and we know each others ways and try not to shame them.  But the more comfortable we get the more complacent and ‘groundhog’s day’ things can get also. So I tried an experiment with some of my coaching clients, have them print out two copies of my Gratitude Journal (free download here), one for them and one for their spouse.  The exercise was to fill in something they were grateful for about their spouse each day. I understand that you are so busy, and who has time to journal, but that’s the point.  This exercise is not about journaling it’s about reflecting and being present to the good things in our lives. When we don’t do that we become Human Doings instead of Human Beings.  BEING grateful is a powerful way to live, and it takes practice for it to be a habit. Plus there’s only two lines to fill in on the journal so it’s quick and easy.

The results were fantastic! They always say ‘an attitude of gratitude’ will go a long way, and in this situation when they broke up the day-to-day routine and instead, started to look for things they were grateful for in their spouse, life changed for the better. They reconnected to the positive things that they love about their spouse. Take the 7 day challenge and do the same – but don’t share the ‘findings’ until the end of the week and it’s best to do it over a date, dinner or maybe a walk. When you surround yourself with good company that you are grateful for your heart changes, and when your heart changes your perspective changes. When your perspective changes from smallness (can sound like “this is an old boring marriage”) to greatness (can sound like “I’m so blessed and grateful for this person”) then we start to change our marriage from smallness to greatness.  Take 1 baby step today to make your marriage great.

Download the Gratitude Journal here:


Pictured: My hubby Greg and I last fall taking a break from our family photo shoot.


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Dena’s passion is to help women entrepreneurs structure, market and lead their business to the next level of greatness and revenue.  Let’s start today.

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